BONUS: LTN 48 - The Dinner Divorce

Love Thy Neighbor: Episode Notes Episode: "The Dinner Divorce" (LTN48) Hosts: Tom Vann, Colette Fehr, Dan Dennis | Guest: None Sponsors / Ad Reads No sponsor segments or ad reads in this episode. Segment Rundown Cold open: intro debate. The hosts argue over whether they need to introduce themselves at the top of every show. Tom calls it pointless since listeners already know who they are. They float making a new intro with names in it for year two, to mark the show's anniversary. What's a food divorce? Colette talks about her recent news appearance on "food divorce," which is when couples eat separately and each person handles their own meals. She puts it alongside other trends like sleep divorce. Dan asks why those couples even live together. The Dennis family dinner. Dan says he and Andrea sit down to dinner together every night, while Maisie often eats at dance. He calls the ritual almost as important as sex because it's when Andrea opens up, including her project manager work gossip. He also covers meal kits like Home Chef and Blue Apron and his weekly meal prep for Maisie. Colette on connection rituals. Colette explains that shared meals are one of the few unstructured connection rituals couples have left. People who grew up eating as a family tend to keep doing it. She shares how she ate alone in her room as a teenager after her parents divorced, making prank conference calls. Tom at the head of the table. Tom's family eats together too, and he likes sitting at the head of the table. He jokes that nobody should introduce themselves there either. He complains that his kids share nothing, eat slowly, and ignore his celebrity stories (he recently talked to the actor who played Puddy on Seinfeld). Colette suggests word games to liven things up, and Tom says his car-ride games haven't gone well. Dan's date nights. Dan says he's recently enjoyed date nights at a local tavern known for crispy pizza, where he mostly just listens to Andrea talk. Quiet Kobe. Tom's wife took their youngest son Max to Hamilton at Dr. Phillips, so Tom took his oldest son Tommy to Kobe Japanese Steakhouse. The two barely talked all night, then Tommy turned on the TV as soon as they got home. Lots of jokes about the oil, the "double white" rice, and the aftermath. Tom also recalls quiet car rides with the men in his family, including a story that started with "one time I killed a man." Companionable silence. Colette reframes the Kobe night: small talk isn't necessarily more connecting than silence, and parents shouldn't feel guilty about quiet moments. Dan and Andrea both thought the outing was great. Dan mentions upcoming one-on-one time with Maisie while Andrea travels for work. In defense of food divorce. Colette says her household basically has a food divorce because of schedules. She wants quiet after a day of doing therapy, and she and her husband still share meals a few times a week. She also points to GLP-1 use and the mental load of meal planning, often carried by women. Her takeaway: do what works, but make time to be present. "What's for dinner?" prank. A host describes his favorite prank: asking his wife what's for dinner at her most stressed moment. It works every time. Email: friend in a scam. "Baltimore Beef Stew" writes about a friend putting $50,000 into an MLM-style unclaimed property scheme despite being warned. Colette says he's already said his piece. Adults have to make their own choices, and he can set limits on what he'll do if it goes badly. Florida Treasure Hunt. The hosts explain that Florida's unclaimed property site, fltreasurehunt.gov, is a real government website even though the name sounds like a scam. They guess the scheme is built around middlemen charging people for money they could claim themselves. When it's your money too. Colette says it's different when a bad decision will land on you financially, like an elderly parent you'd have to support. She shares that she once voiced doubts when her late mother gave money to a questionable religious organization, then let it go. Ask before advising. Tom admits he's a blunt truth teller with the people he loves. His example is laughing off the Grizz's AI-assisted spy novel, and his wife says he comes off like a jerk. Colette's fix is to ask whether someone wants your opinion first. She notes that offhand comments can stick with people for years, and that it's okay to say you're not ready to hear someone's take. Tom's coward approach. Tom says he nods, checks his