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For The Love With Jen Hatmaker Podcast: Daily Summaries Delivered
by Jen Hatmaker
New York Times bestselling author Jen Hatmaker has arrived in the middle years, and she couldn't be happier about it. Jen has navigated the ins and outs of life, from career to parenting, marriage (and divorce), spiritual evolution, and the joys of being a hardcore Gen Xer. With each weekly episode, Jen serves as our "everywoman" guide to all the seasons, past, present, and future, as she walks excitedly and tenaciously into the second half of life. Some weeks, Jen brings her perspective straight to you, just her and the mic, talking through the things we're all navigating. Other weeks, she pulls up a chair for some of the most interesting and accomplished guests around, plus a few of her favorite friends, bringing insight, expertise, and a whole lot of heart to the most relevant topics of our time. While Jen has plenty of wisdom to share (and some pretty hilarious stories, too), she doesn't claim to know it all. From her honest solo reflections to her compelling conversations with guests, she's here to reassure you that you're not alone in this game of life. It's "For the Love" of all that is good, justified, exasperating, exhilarating, real, fun, and so much more.
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- 2 days ago57 min
You Will Not Feel Ready: Jen Hatmaker Solo episode
People tell me I’m brave all the time. About the divorce, about the book, about rebuilding my life while everybody watched. And every single time, I feel a low-grade panic, because I know what it actually looked like from the inside: sitting in my parked car for 45 minutes because I could not make myself walk in, typing one sentence and deleting it 15 times, sobbing in the parking lot outside my brand new financial planner’s office. I was not brave. I was scared, and I moved forward anyway.We’re kicking off our October series, Courage to Change: Do It Scared, and today it’s just me and you. I’m handing you a much smaller word than “ready.” Ready is a feeling, and you can’t schedule a feeling. Willing is a decision, and you can make it on a Tuesday while you unload the dishwasher. We’ll sort fear into two piles: the warning you should heed and the fee you simply have to pay. And I’m going deeper on two stories: the months I waited too long to face what was happening in my marriage, and the years I coddled my fear before publicly changing my theology on LGBTQ inclusion in 2016. That was the best fee I ever paid.Coming up this month: Barbara Kingsolver, Kim and Penn Holderness, and Sarah Stewart Holland and Beth Silvers of Pantsuit Politics. You’re not going to feel ready. But you can get willing, and willing is available to you in the next ten minutes.Thought-provoking Quotes:In my life, ready never came. Not one time in my entire life did readiness already exist before the hard thing.Ready is something like a feeling, and you can’t schedule a feeling. Willing is a decision. Willing is a choice.Fear is not measuring whether or not you should. It is measuring whether or not this thing matters.There is fear that is a warning that should be heeded. And then there is fear that is just a fee. It’s just a cost that you’re going to have to pay.The first one has a real object, but the second one has an audience.The fear was a fee. It was not a warning. And I did have to pay it. It’s the best fee I ever paid.I may not be ready, but I am willing.You’ve done harder things than this. And you did those things scared too.Resources Mentioned in This Episode:Awake: A Memoir by Jen Hatmaker - https://bookshop.org/p/books/untitled-memoir-jen-hatmaker/22287565Join the AWAKE Collective on Letters from the Middle - https://jenhatmaker.substack.comOctober AWAKE Collective Reflection Guide, with this month’s writing prompt: “The Thing I Would Do If I Were Not Scared”Leave us a voicemail - https://jenhatmaker.com/podcast: Tell me the change you’re scared of, or the one you already did scared.Connect with Jen!Jen’s Website - https://jenhatmaker.com/Jen’s Instagram - https://instagram.com/jenhatmaker<a target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" href="http ...
- 1 weeks ago59 min
Liz Moore: Inside The God of the Woods, From Novel to Netflix
This month’s Jen Hatmaker Book Club pick is The God of the Woods, and Liz Moore joins Jen straight off the set of the Netflix series she is co-showrunning in the Adirondacks. Liz talks about the family cabin with no TV and no internet where she read every old book in the house, her early years singing in New York clubs while working weekends at a guitar store, and the practical family that taught her to keep a day job. She explains the difference between a TV writer and a showrunner, why she loves casting local square dancers and first-time actors, and how the cast is deepening the characters she wrote. Plus how she starts a four-year novel knowing only the people, the place, and the first problem, her worries about what AI will do to developing brains, the title her publisher vetoed, the hand-drawn map at the front of the book, and what she is reading right now.Thought-provoking Quotes:You have to know people, you have to know place, and you have to know problem.You just sort of whittle down what feels right emotionally until you get to a place that feels right emotionally, and then that’s the end of the book.You have to experience frustration in learning and then get past it in order for the brain to grow.I want the title to have multiple meanings, and for those multiple meanings to become apparent as the reader moves on.I have too many jobs that I love, which is a huge blessing in life.Resources Mentioned in This Episode:The God of the Woods by Liz MooreLong Bright River by Liz Moore (and the Peacock series)The Words of Every Song by Liz MooreRaven Black by Ann CleevesLondon Falling by Patrick Radden KeefeGet Down by Asali SolomonSing Sing (film)Louis L’Amour westernsTemple University MFA in Creative WritingGuest’s Links:Website - https://www.lizmoore.net/Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/lizmoorebooks/Twitter - https://x.com/LizMooreBooksFacebook - https://www.facebook.com/lizmoorewriter/Connect with Jen!Jen’s Website - https://jenhatmaker.com/Jen’s Instagram - https://instagram.com/jenhatmakerJen’s Twitter - https://twitter.com/jenHatmaker/Jen’s Facebook - https://facebook.com/jenhatmakerJen’s YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/user/JenHatmakerThe For the Love Podcast is presented by Audacy.&nbs ...
- 1 weeks ago57 min
This Is What Happens When Women Read with Julianna Glasse
Description:Julianna Glasse was a Christian pop singer playing megachurches and arenas, married to a Major League Baseball player, and in January 2017 she sang at Donald Trump's National Prayer Breakfast weekend after voting the way her husband voted. Two years later she walked away from her faith, her marriage, and nearly everything she had built. Jen and Julianna trace the unraveling: the question she asked while holding her newborn daughter, the friend who handed her Plato's allegory of the cave, the "Christian drinkers" who changed clothes in the car after her concerts, and the day her then husband threw her books on the floor and said the sentence that became her title. They talk about love versus fear as a compass, why storytelling reaches people that shouting never will, and what Julianna would say to evangelical women quietly questioning how they vote. Now an Oxford alum, Julianna leads the This Is What Happens When Women Read foundation, which partners with Oxford's Saïd Business School to fund MBAs for women leaving high-control religions and cultures and has reached more than four million people in nearly 67 countries. Her memoir, This Is What Happens When Women Read, releases October 13.Thought-provoking Quotes:“You cannot know that which you do not know, but once you do know, it becomes your responsibility.” – Julianna Glasse“Does it feel like love or does it feel like fear?” – Julianna Glasse“This is actually what happens when women read. We notice the systems of oppression that we are in.” – Julianna Glasse“Bare your teeth at the institution, at the dogma, at the policy. Do not bare your teeth to the human.” – Julianna Glasse“It's just the teeniest taste of hope and freedom, and that is the most powerful taste you will ever have.” – Jen HatmakerResources Mentioned in This Episode:This Is What Happens When Women Read by Julianna Glasse (pre-order)Oxford Saïd Business SchoolMaria Popova, The MarginalianPlato's Allegory of the Cave (The Republic)Rebecca GoldsteinWalt Whitman and Ralph Waldo EmersonThe Measure of a Woman by Gene A. GetzGuest’s Links:Website - https://www.juliannaglasse.com/Foundation - https://www.thisiswhathappenswhenwomenread.org/Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/juliannaglasse/Foundation Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/tiwhwwr/Foundation Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/people/This-Is-What-Happens-When-Women-Read/61566356275917/LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/juliannaglasse/Connect with Jen!
- 2 weeks ago54 min
Dr. Galit Atlas on the Wounded Child Running Your Love Life
Description:Why do we keep doing the same thing over and over in love? Same argument, same shutdown, same spiral, same reach toward somebody who cannot or will not reach back. We are grown. We have read the books. And still, something inside us takes the wheel and steers us right back into the ditch.Dr. Galit Atlas says the one driving is probably not you. It is probably the child you used to be.Galit is a psychoanalyst in New York who has spent more than twenty years in a room with people trying to talk about love. Her last book, Emotional Inheritance, was an international bestseller translated into twenty-nine languages. Her new book, Come Closer, names six wounded children most of us are hauling around inside: the frightened child, the melancholic child, the ashamed child, the invisible child, the guilty child, and the chosen child.In this conversation, Galit walks us through all six, what each one actually looks like in an adult relationship, and why we keep reaching for the familiar even when the familiar is what hurt us. She unpacks the invisible child who learned to hide too well, the guilty child who is always bracing to be blamed, and the chosen child who cannot separate from the parent she was recruited to take care of. She also opens her own story: her father's childhood in Iran, the losses her family did not have the privilege to name, and what happened when he showed up for her at the hardest moment of her life.This is not a book about bad parents, and the rummaging is not for its own sake. It is the only way to stop the repeating. The goal is not an apology. The goal is getting the wheel back.Read it with a pen in hand. And you probably already know exactly who to send this one to.Thought-provoking Quotes:“The frightened child is afraid of closeness because they learned that the people they love and the people they depend on can hurt them.” – Dr. Galit Atlas“The familiar is our home. For better and for worse, even if it's filled with demons, it's our home.” – Dr. Galit Atlas“We repeat in order to repair.” – Dr. Galit Atlas“The invisible child masters the art of disappearing.” – Dr. Galit Atlas“As adults, we have the power to know ourselves, we have the power to evolve and to heal. It's on us.” – Dr. Galit Atlas“The goal is to get the wheel back and be in charge of the adult versions of ourselves.” – Jen HatmakerResources Mentioned in This Episode:Come Closer: Childhood Wounds, Adult Love, and the Secrets of Emotional Intimacy – https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Come-Closer/Galit-Atlas/9781668067147Emotional Inheritance: A Therapist, Her Patients, and the Legacy of Trauma by Dr. Galit AtlasD.W. Winnicott on hiding: it is a joy to be hidden, but a disaster not to be foundGuest’s Links:Website - https://www.galitatlas.com/Instagram - https://instagram.com/galit_atlasSubstack - https://wildanalysiswithgalitatlas.substack.com/Connect with Jen!Jen’s Website - https://jenhatmaker.com/Jen’s Instagram - <a target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" href="https://instagram.com/j ...
- 2 weeks ago57 min
Zibby Owens on Losing the Plot, Starting Over, and Building a Life Around Books Description:
Description:Calling all book lovers, calling all readers, calling everyone who has faced down a reinvention in the middle of life. Zibby Owens is one of the book world’s most tireless and warm-hearted connectors: a podcaster who has interviewed more than 2,000 authors, a publisher, a bookstore owner, a self-described accidental activist, and now an author herself. Ten years ago she was a perfectionistic stay-at-home mom of four on the Upper East Side, up at 4:55 a.m. to sign up for parent teacher conferences, with color-coded calendars and no time to read. Then she got divorced, fell in love with her tennis pro, recorded a podcast into her phone from her bed on a whim, and rebuilt the whole thing: new career, new marriage, new name, new voice.Her memoir in essays, Between Chapters: How I Started Over, Took Some Chances, and Found the Plot, is out now. In this Sacred Work conversation, Jen and Zibby get into what losing the plot actually feels like from the inside, the tiny unglamorous steps that add up to an entirely different life, why she sunsets things that are still making money, and how books became the connection vehicle for a whole community of women. Also: shy kids who grew up into very public careers, and the permission slip Zibby would hand her 39-year-old self.Thought-provoking Quotes:"There is a way. You are not stuck. Your life is not over. You can take these small steps to remember who you are. And it is not selfish. It is imperative." - Zibby Owens"When you cannot remember the last time you belly laughed, that could be a red flag to pay attention to." - Jen Hatmaker"Save nothing for the swim home." - Jen Hatmaker, quoting her agent Margaret"Talking about books is really talking about life." - Zibby Owens"It’s not just, well, I guess this is it because it has to be. This is it because it can be, and it should be." - Jen HatmakerResources Mentioned in This Episode:Between Chapters: How I Started Over, Took Some Chances, and Found the Plot by Zibby Owens (Zibby Publishing)On Being Jewish Now, edited by Zibby Owens"A Mother’s Right to Sanity," Zibby’s essay that went viral overnightThe Between Chapters essay platform on Substack, where readers write about their own chaptersAuthors in the mix: Dani Shapiro, Anna Quindlen, and Sarah Mlynowski, who told Zibby to start a podcastChildhood favorites: The Secret Garden, A Little Princess, Charlotte’s Web, Nancy Drew, and Little House on the PrairieGuest’s Links:Website - https://zibbymedia.com/Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/zibbyowens/Substack - https://www.zibbyowens.com/Podcast - Totally Booked with Zibby https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/totally-booked-with-zibby/id1366633318Connect with Jen!<a target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" href="ht ...
- 3 weeks ago40 min
Encore: Psychologist Mary Pipher on Flourishing as We Age
Description:Mary Pipher has spent her whole career noticing the gap between what the culture says is happening to women and what is actually happening to them. She did it in her thirties with Reviving Ophelia, and she did it again decades later with Women Rowing North. In this Sacred Work encore, Jen sits down with the clinical psychologist and author of eleven books to talk about the second half of life and what it actually asks of you. Mary makes the case that women get happier as they age, and she has the research to back it up, along with a story about two locker rooms that lands harder than any statistic. She also talks about thanking her own worn out hands for a lifetime of work, why reasonable expectations are the one thing happy people everywhere share, and the line Jen has not been able to shake since: we all age, but we do not all grow. Only one of those is up to you.Thought-provoking Quotes:We all age but we don’t all grow.If you don’t become better you become bitter. You either grow or you shrink.You should thank your hands for all the work they have done for you.We all find what we’re looking for.I have everything I need to be happy right between my ears.Resources Mentioned in This Episode:Women Rowing North: Navigating Life’s Currents and Flourishing As We Age by Mary PipherReviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls by Mary PipherA Life in Light: Meditations on Impermanence by Mary PipherThe Second Sex by Simone de BeauvoirComplete list of Mary Pipher’s books: https://marypipher.com/booksMargaret Mead’s idea of post menopausal zestJane Jarvis, American jazz pianist: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jane_JarvisGuest’s Links:Website - https://marypipher.comFacebook - https://www.facebook.com/authormarypipherConnect with Jen!Jen’s Website - https://jenhatmaker.com/Jen’s Instagram - https://instagram.com/jenhatmakerJen’s Twitter - https://twitter.com/jenHatmaker/Jen’s Facebook - https://facebook.com/jenhatmakerJen’s YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/user/JenHatmakerThe For the Love Podcast is presented by Audacy.
- 3 weeks ago46 min
Secure-ish: The Real Goal of Self-Worth with Dr. Marisa G. Franco
Description:Dr. Marisa G. Franco is back — and this time, she's turning the lens inward. Marisa is the New York Times bestselling author of Platonic and a psychologist at the University of Maryland, and her brand new book, Worth: The New Science of Self-Esteem and Secure Attachment, might just be the most important thing she's ever written. It is tender, personal, and research-backed in equal measure — and friend, it will find you.In this conversation, Marisa and Jen dig into the central argument of the book: that trying to become a "secure" person — calm, confident, regulated, healed — is one of the most efficient ways to stay stuck. The goal, Marisa says, is not security. It's being secure-ish. That means making room for the anxious parts and the avoidant parts, the shame and the neediness and the grief, and offering those parts the care they never got instead of running from them one more time.In this discussion, you’ll also hear:Why the goal was never to be fully "secure" — and what it means to be secure-ish insteadWhy your insecurities are messengers, not enemies — and how to stop whack-a-moleing them into silenceThe memories that are keeping you stuck — and the science that proves you can actually change how they live in youThe messages installed in us by the wider world — faith, bodies, marriage, worth — and what it looks like to do this work when those messages came from somewhere we once considered holyAnd Marisa shares her own story, the one that cracked her open: a hike, a relationship unraveling, and the moment she finally stopped performing calm long enough to say the true thing out loud.This is a conversation for anyone who has been trying to be better than they are instead of being who they are. Which is to say — it's for all of us.Thought-provoking Quotes:“The struggle of not feeling worthy is that you're stuck in the same sense of reality. You're trapped and you don't know how to get out. People are loving you but you don't feel loved. The beauties of life slide off of you. I just want people to get free of that.” - Dr. Marisa G. Franco“We have to start with allowing what is, with the truth. So many of us don’t think we can because we have to be something different than we are. But being where you are, that's where the healing happens.” - Dr. Marisa G. Franco“I'm still learning for my first reaction to no longer be, what am I allowed to feel according to other people? What am I allowed to look like according to other people? And for my first question to be what expresses who I am and how I actually feel, even if that violates all of the rules as to how I should feel or how I should present myself? That's where I need to begin, in the truth.” - Dr. Marisa G. FrancoResources Mentioned in This Episode:Worth: The New Science of Self-Esteem and Secure Attachment by Dr. Marisa Franco - https://amzn.to/42N2MyEPlatonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make--and Keep--Friends by Dr. Marisa Franco - https://amzn.to/4dph3rmFriendship MeCourse - https://shop.jenhatmaker.com/products/friendship-for-the-rest-of-us<a target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" href="https://www.aspenideas.org/sessions/the-great-friendship-res ...
- 4 weeks ago36 min
Encore: Barbara Brown Taylor on Being the Saint of Small Things
Description:Barbara Brown Taylor gave us the question that ends every episode of this show, so it feels right to hand the Sacred Work series over to her. In this encore, the New York Times bestselling author, teacher, and Episcopal priest talks with Jen about the year she spent doing almost nothing impressive: the county fair with a couple of six-year-olds, an old racehorse nobody wanted, blueberry pies for friends going through hard things, and shifts at the public library. She calls herself the saint of small things, and she is honest about how hard that is to say out loud when people want to know what big thing you are working on. They also get into why she is wary of hope that functions as an escape hatch, how she keeps her heart from going wooden in a world of terrible headlines, and why friendship is worth protecting even though nobody rewards you for it. Stay to the end for the benediction Barbara wrote for this community.Thought-provoking Quotes:I’ll be the saint of small things today.Headlines give me omniscience but no omnipotence.I’ve got to attend to the sustainability of a supple heart.I’m real wary of hope unless it functions right here, right now.The years are short but the days are long, and that’s a blessing not a curse.Resources Mentioned in This Episode:A Rhythm of Prayer by Sarah Bessey, which includes Barbara’s contributionThis Here Flesh by Cole Arthur Riley, who has also been a guest on For the LoveWhen God Is Silent by Barbara Brown TaylorLeaving Church by Barbara Brown TaylorLearning to Walk in the Dark by Barbara Brown TaylorAn Altar in the World by Barbara Brown TaylorGuest’s Links:Website - https://barbarabrowntaylor.comFacebook - https://www.facebook.com/authorBarbaraBrownTaylorConnect with Jen!Jen’s Website - https://jenhatmaker.com/Jen’s Instagram - https://instagram.com/jenhatmakerJen’s Twitter - https://twitter.com/jenHatmaker/Jen’s Facebook - https://facebook.com/jenhatmakerJen’s YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/user/JenHatmakerThe For the Love Podcast is presented by Audacy.
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About For The Love With Jen Hatmaker Podcast
New York Times bestselling author Jen Hatmaker has arrived in the middle years, and she couldn't be happier about it. Jen has navigated the ins and outs of life, from career to parenting, marriage (and divorce), spiritual evolution, and the joys of being a hardcore Gen Xer. With each weekly episode, Jen serves as our "everywoman" guide to all the seasons, past, present, and future, as she walks excitedly and tenaciously into the second half of life. Some weeks, Jen brings her perspective straight to you, just her and the mic, talking through the things we're all navigating. Other weeks, she pulls up a chair for some of the most interesting and accomplished guests around, plus a few of her favorite friends, bringing insight, expertise, and a whole lot of heart to the most relevant topics of our time. While Jen has plenty of wisdom to share (and some pretty hilarious stories, too), she doesn't claim to know it all. From her honest solo reflections to her compelling conversations with guests, she's here to reassure you that you're not alone in this game of life. It's "For the Love" of all that is good, justified, exasperating, exhilarating, real, fun, and so much more.
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