RE 597: Moving On

Today we have Shane. He is 45 years old, lives in Northern California, and he took his last drink on September 12th, 2013.   This episode is brought to you by:   Sign up and get 10% off: Better Help   It's not too late to join us in Bozeman, MT. The retreat is August 12th-16th. We have cabin and camping spots still available.   [01:08] Thoughts from Paul:   Paul shares that he is having trouble moving on after his loss of Ben. There is still a pile of poop in his yard that he is not going to pick up. He reflects that over time; he knows it will eventually disappear as life moves on and so will he eventually.   Moving on from alcohol is hard too. Yes, there were fun times, great memories, but it turned and it's no longer serving us. As a community, we are all moving on.   As Odette said in episode 282 – you can miss drinking even though you don't want to drink anymore. Don't sweep the pain of losing alcohol under a rug, it needs to be grieved as it is the loss of a major life companion. But…we are moving on. And you are invited to join us.   [04:17] Paul introduces Shane:   Shane is from Northern California, is married and they have two children. He works full time in podcasting and communications, and for fun he enjoys playing golf, chess and fitness.   Shane says he grew up in an alcoholic household, and his parents were very young when they had him. Growing up he had a lot of resentments and anger towards his parents which he feels led him down the path to use alcohol and other drugs to escape.   After a baseball injury, Shane started playing in bands with aspirations of making it in the music business. Along with this came a lot of partying, drugs and alcohol which ended up being a big part of his twenties. In the back of his mind he knew he didn't want to live that way, but he ignored it.   Once they had their daughter, Shane began to realize that he was becoming everything that he never wanted to be. The last three years of his drinking progressed so quickly, Shane says, and drinking was such a normalized part of life. <