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by Tom Kelly
Tom Kelly is a Long Island comedian going through his midlife crisis with an independent podcast where he just has fun. After decades working behind the scenes in television and radio, Tom mixes comedy, personal stories, show-business adventures, Long Island characters, street interviews, local businesses and conversations with interesting people. Sometimes it's funny. Sometimes it's deep. There's no real plan. Whether it's at a TV show or on the Long Island Expressway . . . you're with Tom Kelly . . . in the moment as Tom keeps trying to remember to have fun.
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- Today29 min
487: Paul McCartney Is With My Ex and Why Keith Chase Hates Long Island
Why does comedian Keith Chase (@ChaseTheShortGuy) hate Long Island — even though he grew up in one of its wealthier communities? Tom Kelly sits down with fellow Long Island comedian Keith Chase on New York City's Upper West Side for a funny, surprisingly personal conversation about growing up in Roslyn, Long Island stereotypes, wealth, privilege, community, politics and getting outside the bubble you grew up in. First, Tom and Keith get distracted by the unusual connection between Paul McCartney, Nancy Shevell and Nassau County Executive/Governor candidate Bruce Blakeman. Keith also gives possibly the most controversial ranking of The Beatles ever attempted on a podcast. Pasted text Then Keith explains what he disliked about growing up in Roslyn: the money, status competition, entitlement and feeling that everyone was trying to prove they'd "made it." But he also talks about the advantages he had, the teachers who influenced him and why he's grateful for the opportunities his hometown gave him. The conversation expands into Long Island culture, Massapequa vs. Roslyn, changing neighborhoods, why Keith doesn't want to move back to Long Island, and how leaving his hometown bubble changed the way he sees the world. Timestamps 00:00 Paul McCartney, Bruce Blakeman & What's Coming Up 00:27 Comedian Keith Chase Joins The Tom Kelly Show 01:15 The Paul McCartney–Bruce Blakeman Connection 02:16 Tom's Encounter With Bruce Blakeman in Sag Harbor 02:40 Why It's Dangerous for Creators to Talk Politics 03:39 How Nancy Shevell Ended Up With Paul McCartney 05:53 Would You Rather Your Ex Leave You for a Beatle? 06:21 Keith Ranks The Beatles From Best to Worst 08:33 Keith's Advice for Bruce Blakeman 09:25 Tom's Strange Tom Brady Connection 10:59 Massapequa vs. Roslyn 12:31 What Does Keith Hate About Roslyn? 13:22 The "I Made It, So I'm Better Than You" Attitude 14:08 Working as a Lifeguard in East Hills 16:00 When Adults Bully the Lifeguards 17:07 What Keith Actually Loved About Roslyn 17:35 The Teachers Who Changed His Life 18:31 Leaving the Family Home Behind 19:38 How Roslyn Became a Jewish Long Island Suburb 20:35 Roslyn's Connection to the Man Who Built Levittown 21:18 Would Keith Ever Move Back to Long Island? 21:37 What Keith Hates About Long Island Culture 22:18 Long Island vs. Jersey, Westchester & Connecticut 23:36 How Did Long Island Prepare Keith for the Real World? 23:57 Escaping the Roslyn Bubble 25:10 Massapequa's Version of the Long Island Bubble 25:42 The Childhood Tragedy That Changed Keith's Perspective 27:01 Tom's Very Different Massapequa Experience 27:36 How New Yorkers Respond to Tragedy 28:25 Why Keith Needed to Get Out and See the World Follow Tom Kelly: @TomKellyShow Follow Keith Chase: @ChaseTheShortGuy
- 2 weeks ago19 min
486: Why Businesses Hate Long Island Influencers
Why are some Long Island business owners getting frustrated with influencers — and does paying someone $1,500 for an Instagram video actually bring customers through the door? Tom Kelly and Steve Burgerer take the podcast on the road from Sunrise Highway to Southampton for a loose Long Island conversation about influencers, sponsored content, getting paid for creative work, and Tom's philosophy on when he will — and won't — promote a business. Tom talks about the criticism that influencers will promote anything for money, whether influencer marketing actually works for local businesses, and the difference between making an advertisement and making something people actually want to watch. Then things wander—as they should—into Tom's price for "selling out," the time a charity organizer promised him an extra $1,000 and didn't pay, losing a TV job right after buying his mother an iPhone, why he doesn't announce new gigs until they're secure, and whether Tom's parents are basically the nice version of Ray Barone's parents. Why are some Long Island business owners getting frustrated with influencers — and does paying someone $1,500 for an Instagram video actually bring customers through the door? Tom Kelly and Steve Burgerer take the podcast on the road from Sunrise Highway to Southampton for a loose Long Island conversation about influencers, sponsored content, getting paid for creative work, and Tom's philosophy on when he will — and won't — promote a business. Tom talks about the criticism that influencers will promote anything for money, whether influencer marketing actually works for local businesses, and the difference between making an advertisement and making something people actually want to watch. Then things wander—as they should—into Tom's price for "selling out," the time a charity organizer promised him an extra $1,000 and didn't pay, losing a TV job right after buying his mother an iPhone, why he doesn't announce new gigs until they're secure, and whether Tom's parents are basically the nice version of Ray Barone's parents. Timestamps 00:00 Why Do People Hate Long Island Influencers? 00:24 Podcasting From Sunrise Highway 00:38 The Most Long Island Thing Ever 01:23 Why Podcasting Isn't As Easy As It Looks 02:05 Explaining The Tom Kelly Show to a Stranger 02:37 What the Hell Is Quogue? 02:58 Where Has Steve Burgerer Been? 04:03 Long Island Businesses Are Rebelling Against Influencers 04:28 Are Influencers Worth $1,500? 04:44 Can You Trust a Paid Influencer? 04:51 Has Tom Kelly Ever "Sold Out"? 05:45 What's Tom's Sellout Price? 05:59 Burger City vs. Shake Shack 07:05 How Much Money Makes a Bad Gig Worth It? 07:44 Why Tom Used to Turn Down $2,250 Gigs 08:31 The Charity Gig That Owed Tom $1,000 09:43 Why You Can't Win a Feud With St. Jude 10:40 Why Tom Won't Announce His New TV Gig Yet 11:04 Another Comedian Took Tom's TV Job 12:03 Steve Finally Meets Tom's Parents 12:25 Are Tom's Parents Like Everybody Loves Raymond? 13:25 Tom Buys His Mom Her First iPhone 14:09 Tom Loses a TV Job Right After Buying the iPhone 14:38 Joey Kola's Rule About Counting on a Gig 15:10 Do Influencer Videos Actually Work for Sponsors? 15:41 Why Did This Sponsored Video Underperform? 16:32 Magic Mirror & Listener Shout-Outs 18:39 Why Tom Is Making More Social Media Clips 18:54 Heading to Southampton
- Aug 31, 202624 min
485: Dealing With Pet Loss - Pet Loss Therapist Judith Rosen
Is losing a pet really as painful as losing a human family member? How do you know when pet grief has become something you need help dealing with—and what should you NEVER say to someone whose pet just died? Tom Kelly sits down with longtime friend Judith Eve Rosen, LCSW, a clinical social worker specializing in veterinary social work and author of Life After Pet Loss: Daily Reflections for Working Through Grief. Judith explains how an experience in a veterinary emergency room inspired her to specialize in pet loss and the human-animal bond. 📖 BOOK — Life After Pet Loss: Daily Reflections for Working Through Grief Buy Life After Pet Loss on Amazon 📸 INSTAGRAM — @mypetlosstherapist Follow My Pet Loss Therapist on Instagram 🌐 JUDITH EVE ROSEN JudithEveRosen.com TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Pet Grief & Life After Pet Loss 00:40 Meet Pet Loss Therapist Judith Eve Rosen 01:09 Is Pet Grief Really That Serious? 02:09 How Judith Became a Pet Loss Therapist 03:05 Veterinary Social Work Is a Real Specialty 03:44 Life After Pet Loss 04:01 Why People Seek Help After Losing a Pet 04:29 The WORST Things to Say When Someone's Pet Dies 05:11 What Is Disenfranchised Grief? 06:13 Does Everyone Need a Pet Loss Therapist? 07:27 PTSD and Traumatic Pet Loss 08:15 How Do You Know When Someone Needs Help? 08:31 Is Losing a Pet Like Losing a Family Member? 09:16 When Pet Loss Becomes Compounded Grief 10:10 Losing a Pet When You Live Alone 10:33 Does Losing a Dog Hurt More Than Losing a Rabbit or Fish? 11:27 Grieving ALL Kinds of Pets 12:58 How Do You Move On After Losing a Pet? 13:22 Keeping Your Pet's Collar, Bed or Favorite Things 14:3
- Aug 18, 202623 min
484: Long Island's First Buffalo Pizza Slice - Pizzaiola Peter Romanelli
Long Island Based Influencer and Comedian Tom Kelly was complaining about the growth of people doing videos and similar to his. Brittany Stigliano - ThatMom_Brittany on Instagram suggested Tom meet Peter Romanelli of Pizzaiola . . . owner of the Long Island pizza shop that lays claim to the first ever Buffalo Chicken slice. - Was the first Buffalo Chicken pizza slice invented at Pizziola of North Babylon, Long Island? Does every pizza shop owner now also have to be a TikTok comedian? What can comedians and creatives learn from pizza owners? Are pizza shop owners jerks? - - Pizzaaiola of North Babylon: @pizzaiolanb Brittany Stigliano: @ThatMom_Brittany
- Aug 10, 202627 min
482: Perez Hilton And What I Hate About Lindenhurst - Plus Dog Poop
Tom Kelly goes from celebrity culture to Long Island problems and then ends with a tribute to one of the people who helped shape his life. Tom reacts to the troubling news surrounding Perez Hilton and reflects on fame, career reinvention, getting older, and the difficulty of trying to recreate an earlier high point in your career. It leads Tom to an important realization: sometimes the people who matter most aren't in show business — they're simply the people who love you. Then, a neighborhood debate: Is it wrong to put your dog's poop in somebody else's garbage can? Tom has a definite opinion. Next, we're going to Lindenhurst, Long Island. Tom asked Lindenhurst residents what they hate about their own town. Parking apps, fishing permits, disappearing landmarks, confusing streets, yard-sale rules, the town's legendary reputation for bars — and why Tom actually loves Lindenhurst. Finally, Tom remembers Gary Proce, his former Long Island Lutheran High School athletic director and mentor. Gary helped a shy teenage Tom come out of his shell, nominated him for a Christian Service Award, encouraged his sense of humor and helped give him some of his earliest opportunities. Tom reflects on Gary's life, his many careers, and the importance of telling people they made a difference while you still have the chance. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 — Coming Up: Perez Hilton, Dog Poop & Lindenhurst 00:52 — The Tom Kelly Show 01:14 — What Is The Tom Kelly Show? 02:13 — Magic Mirror & Listener Shout-Outs 02:57 — Good Morning America & Tom's TV Career 03:52 — What's The Next Chapter? 04:09 — Who Moved My Cheese? & Reinventing Yourself 06:00 — Perez Hilton & The Early Internet Era 06:47 — Perez Hilton's Troubling Livestream 07:03 — Fame, Midlife & Trying To Recapture Success 08:06 — Appreciating The People Who Love You 08:33 — Is It Wrong To Put Dog Poop In Someone Else's Garbage? 09:28 — The Neighborhood Dog-Poop Wars 10:26 — Why Tom Says It's Wrong 11:41 — It's Your Dog. It's Your Poop. 12:33 — Leaving The Apartment & Taking The Podcast On The Road 13:22 — What People From Lindenhurst Hate About Lindenhurst 14:02 — The Lindenhurst Vibe 14:55 — "Swindlehurst" vs. "Lindy" 15:27 — Why Do The Sidewalks Suddenly End? 15:49 — Lindenhurst Parking & Parking Apps 16:57 — Paying To Fish From The Lindenhurst Docks 17:29 — Lost Lindenhurst Landmarks 18:05 — Lindenhurst's Confusing Streets 18:48 — Only One Yard Sale A Year? 19:50 — Does Lindenhurst Really Have The Most Bars? 20:46 — The Football Stadium Problem 20:58 — Missing The Lindenhurst You Grew Up In 21:13 — Why Tom Loves Lindenhurst 21:42 — Remembering Gary Proce 22:21 — How Gary Helped A Shy Tom Kelly 22:54 — The Christian Service Award That Changed Tom 23:31 — Gary Helped Give Tom His First Paid Video Work 24:17 — "Scoop Kelly" & The Adults Who Notice The Quiet Kids 25:08 — Tell People The Impact They Had On You 25:45 — Gary Proce's Remarkable Life & Many Careers 26:30 — A Real Long Island Hustler 26:52 — Remembering One Of The Greats 27:09 — Your Homework: Tell Someone They Made A Difference - Most Importantly - Tom remembers a mentor: former Long Island Lutheran High School athletic director Gary Proce. -
- Jul 27, 202619 min
481a: Long Island's Unwritten Rules Part 2 | Live From Lucharitos in Melville
Now posting this as video. Please text if you get it. - Editing Error - Had To Repost The Long Island debate continues! After receiving more than 1,000 Facebook comments, Tom Kelly and producer Steve Burger return to Lucharitos on Walt Whitman Road in Melville for Part 2 of the funniest, strangest, and most relatable Long Island Unwritten Rules. This episode dives into Long Island driving habits, bagel etiquette, diners, disco fries, beach behavior, deli traditions, parking wars, the Long Island Railroad, Dairy Barn memories, pizza debates, and dozens of local customs that every Long Islander seems to know. Plus, Tom goes on a hilarious rant about Long Island copycats, debates whether you should ever toast a fresh bagel, explains why nobody should park in a fire lane, and wraps up with a spirited discussion about whether tacos belong on a first date. Recorded live at Lucharitos, a Long Island original with great tacos, margaritas, family-friendly events, and bingo nights. If you stop by, tell them The Tom Kelly Show sent you! Follow Lucharitos on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lucharitos Timestamps 00:00 Welcome back to Lucharitos 00:20 Follow Lucharitos & subscribe to The Tom Kelly Show 00:53 Long Island Unwritten Rules – Part 2 begins 01:21 Why this is the "B List" of rules 01:47 Tom jokes about Long Island podcast copycats 02:25 Avoid the Long Island Expressway whenever possible 03:17 Long Island traffic survival strategies 04:17 When did ATVs start driving on parkways? 04:33 Sunday bagels and bakery traditions 04:57 Eat All American hamburgers in the parking lot 05:07 Green light etiquette & immediate honking 05:31 Long Island diners after movies and date nights 06:05 Late-night Long Island food: disco fries & White Castle 06:38 Should you ever toast a fresh bagel? 07:22 Right turns on red and camera anxiety 08:13 Beach etiquette: don't set up on top of strangers 08:31 Boar's Head should be sliced paper thin 08:47 Snow parking spot etiquette 09:13 Keep your lawn looking good 09:31 Never show up empty-handed to someone's house 10:18 Talking to strangers on the Long Island Railroad 11:07 Return your shopping cart (and Tom's church parking rant) 13:00 Long Island pronunciations & local sayings 14:10 Dairy Barn memories and handing over cash 14:42 Breakfast sandwiches belong on hard rolls 14:55 Ranch dressing on pizza? 15:27 Sicilian vs. Grandma slices 15:47 Egg creams, mustard, and deli traditions 16:23 Sweet'N Low is the official Long Island sweetener 17:00 Pizza parlors vs. pizza places 17:37 Jones Beach tunnel tradition & teaser for Part 3 17:49 Why Lucharitos is worth a visit 18:19 Would you take a first date to Lucharitos? 19:24 Final thoughts and thanks to Lucharitos Topics Covered Long Island unwritten rules Long Island Expressway Bagels & bacon, egg and cheese All American Burger Long Island diners Disco fries Long Island Railroad Dairy Barn Pizza debates Jones Beach Lucharitos Melville Long Island culture #TomKellyShow #LongIsland #LongIslandPodcast #Lucharitos #Melville #LongIslandComedy #Bagels #Pizza #LongIslandLife #JonesBeach #BaconEggAndCheese #Podcast---------------- Socials: @TomKellyShow Website And Podcast: https://tomkellyshow.com
- Jul 20, 202622 min
480: Unwritten Long Island Rules at Lucharito's of Melville (Part 1)
What are the unwritten rules of Long Island? Tom Kelly and video producer Steve Burger take over Lucharitos on Walt Whitman Road in Melville to debate the rules every real Long Islander seems to know—even though nobody ever wrote them down. After asking Facebook for answers and getting more than 1,000 responses, Tom breaks down the biggest Long Island rules: never park in front of someone else's house, always say you live on Long Island, order your bacon, egg and cheese correctly, move out of the left lane, know your deli order before reaching the counter, and never question Long Island pizza, bagels, or Billy Joel. The conversation also covers Long Island accents, Jamaica Station anxiety, pizza-folding etiquette, buttered rolls, the Southern State, "going out east," and why Queens and Brooklyn may be geographically on the same island—but are not considered Long Island. This is Part 1 of the Long Island Unwritten Rules series, recorded live at Lucharitos in Melville. Follow: Lucharitos on Instagram! https://www.instagram.com/lucharitos/?hl=en Timestamps 00:00 Podcasting from Lucharitos in Melville 00:59 Welcome to The Tom Kelly Show 01:22 Help Lucharitos reach 30,000 followers 01:45 Introducing Long Island's unwritten rules 02:17 More than 1,000 Facebook responses 02:58 Bacon, egg and cheese: salt, pepper, ketchup 03:48 Don't park in front of someone else's house 05:00 Lucharitos food arrives 05:19 You live on Long Island—not in Long Island 05:53 Bacon, egg and cheese belongs on a Kaiser roll 06:54 The left lane is for faster traffic 07:29 The Long Island accent 08:01 It's a hero—not a sub, hoagie, or grinder 08:27 Pizza is a pie and a plain slice is a regular slice 08:45 Should you fold your pizza? 09:15 Never change trains at Jamaica 10:06 Are Queens and Brooklyn part of Long Island? 11:00 Stop signs and turn signals are apparently optional 11:17 Manhattan is simply "the city" 11:51 Every Long Islander must respect Billy Joel 12:13 Billy Joel drove into a house—and people blamed the house 12:42 Why this topic needs a Part 2 13:20 Southern State—not Southern State Parkway 13:46 Parkways versus expressways 14:17 What does "regular coffee" mean? 14:52 The Hamptons versus "out east" 15:24 Know your deli or bagel order before reaching the counter 16:37 Long Island has the best pizza and bagels 17:43 Stay off other people's lawns 18:00 Massapequa neighborhood drama 19:24 A buttered roll counts as breakfast 20:07 Long Island merging etiquette 20:20 Pineapple—and other fruit—on pizza 21:06 Place your deli order and step aside 21:15 A yellow light means speed up 21:54 Part 1 wraps up 22:26 Subscribe and good night from Walt Whitman Road
- Jul 12, 202618 min
479: Long Island Pizza Wars At Autospa of Williston Park With Fat Jay
The Tom Kelly Show goes on location to Auto Spa of Williston Park on Willis Avenue for a sponsored podcast with Tom Kelly, Steve Burger behind the camera, and special guest Fat Jay. While Tom's "Massapequa Mobile" gets an oil change, Tom and Fat Jay riff about Auto Spa, Christmas in July, Long Island car maintenance, and why this shop doesn't hit you with the old-school mechanic upsell. Then the conversation turns into a full Long Island pizza debate: viral pizza feuds, influencer drama, underrated slices, old-school Italian spots, dangerous parking lots, and the pizza places that deserve more attention. Fat Jay gives his takes on the Long Island pizza wars, bromate drama, Three Brothers of Rockville Centre, Dario's, Phil's, Lombardo's of Seaford, Anona of Valley Stream, Little Vincent's, Mama's, Umberto's, Carmela's, Galleria of Merrick, and more. Auto Spa employees even jump in with their own underrated pizza picks, including Enzo's of Williston Park, Mama Theresa's, and Frantony's. It's part podcast, part local business shout-out, part Long Island food fight — all from inside Auto Spa while the oil change is actually happening. Watch The Tom Kelly Show on YouTube and listen on all podcast apps. Follow Auto Spa of Williston Park on Instagram and tell them Tom Kelly sent you.
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About Tom Kelly Show
Tom Kelly is a Long Island comedian going through his midlife crisis with an independent podcast where he just has fun. After decades working behind the scenes in television and radio, Tom mixes comedy, personal stories, show-business adventures, Long Island characters, street interviews, local businesses and conversations with interesting people. Sometimes it's funny. Sometimes it's deep. There's no real plan. Whether it's at a TV show or on the Long Island Expressway . . . you're with Tom Kelly . . . in the moment as Tom keeps trying to remember to have fun.
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