LOVERS by Shan

You’ve Been Using Attachment Theory Wrong says Leading Expert Dr Amir Levine

May 6, 2026·58 min
Episode Description from the Publisher

Showing love to our sponsor Arya. You deserve a novelty and pleasure in your intimate, ESPECIALLY in light of Mothers’ Day. Head to https://www.arya.fyi/mothersday to learn more Sex Is a Skill. Beducated is where you learn it. Join the world's largest sex school and access 150+ courses for curious adults: https://beduc.at/bg2619-boody  —————————— How much of your attachment style is actually formed in childhood? In this episode, Shan sits down with renowned psychiatrist and attachment expert Dr. Amir Levine to unpack the myths around attachment theory and why attachment styles are far more flexible than people think. Dr. Levine explores the nuances of anxious, avoidant, and secure attachment, with a specific emphasis on avoidant attachment and the misconceptions surrounding it in modern dating culture. He explains why attachment is better understood as a belief system rather than a fixed diagnosis, revisits the groundbreaking “Strange Situation” experiment developed by Mary Ainsworth, and shares practical tools like the Tennis Wall of Love and the C.A.R.R.P. method to help build healthier, more secure relationships. The conversation also explores how technology and modern communication have completely changed the way we connect, date, and experience intimacy today. Follow Dr. Amir Get His New Book Secure → https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/secure-amir-levine/1148276412 Get His Bestselling Book Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find and Keep Love → https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/attached-amir-levine/1102355415 Connect with Dr. Amir → https://amirlevinemd.com Want more Lover? Shan’s AI trained to give you her advice → http://loversbyshan.com  Get a free weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletter  Join the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/community Explore free quizzes + worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes

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