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Psychologists Off the Clock: Daily Summaries Delivered
by Debbie Sorensen, Jill Stoddard, Yael Schonbrun, Michael Herold & Emily Edlynn
We are five experts in psychology, bringing you science-backed ideas that can help you flourish in your work, relationships, and health.
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- 2 days ago57 min
480. Original Sin with Kathryn Paige Harden
Listen and Learn:Why genes, like environments, tilt the playing field without determining the outcome, and what a cloned Texas bull named Second Chance (who gored his owners, unlike the sweet original) teaches us about genetic determinismWhy "What if you'd had my childhood?" invites sympathy while "What if you'd had my genome?" feels like an identity threat, and how DNA has become our modern "essence placeholder"What the Lindsay Clancy and Andrea Yates cases reveal about the limits of our victim/perpetrator binary, and why our legal system and moral intuitions struggle when someone is bothHow punishment shows up across the natural world, from paper wasp queens who get deposed for eating too many of their sisters' eggs to fig trees that shrivel the fruit of lazy pollinatorsWhy our retributive drive is deeply "baked into the evolutionary sauce," and why simply understanding the free will problem won't make it disappearDurkheim's argument that a society without crime would be neither possible nor desirable, and how deviance drives moral innovationWhy accountability has become collapsed with punishment, in criminal justice and in modern parenting debates, and what a "third way" might look likeHow the Norwegian response to Anders Breivik reframes the question from "Does this person deserve punishment?" to "How do we treat someone who has done something terrible and is still one of us?"Why dehumanizing others degrades the punisher as well as the punished, and how service-based consequences might replace immiserationResources:Kathryn Paige Harden's website: https://www.kpharden.comOriginal Sin by Kathryn Paige HardenWhy Don't You Understand Me?: The Surprising Science Behind Connecting in a World of Missed Signals by Yael Schonbrun Form to get pre-order bonuses for Why Don't You Understand Me? Yael's favorite true crime podcasts: Beyond All RepairLove TrappedThe DropoutSerialDr. DeathOne of Us: The Story of a Massacre in Norway and Its Aftermath by Åsne SeierstadThe View From Nowhere by Thomas Nagel"What Is It Like to Be a Bat?" by Thomas NagelOutraged by Kurt GrayAbout Kathryn Paige HardenKathryn Paige Harden is a professor of clinical psychology at the University of Texas at Austin, where she leads the Developmental Behavior Genetics Lab, studying how kids' and teens' DNA sequences and epigenomes interact with their environments to shape thought, feeling, and behavior. She earned her PhD in clinical psychology from the University of Virginia and trained clinically at McLean Hospital, Harvard Medical School. Her first book, The Genetic Lottery, argued that genetics matters for social equality and made her one of the most debated scientists writing for a general audience. Her new book, Original Sin, is part memoir, part behavioral genetics primer, and part philosophical reckoning with her own evangelical upbringing, arguing that the question of why people do terrible things cannot be answered by nature or nurture alone.Related Episodes:392. Outraged with Kurt Gray<a href="https://offtheclockpsych.c
- 1 weeks ago42 min
479. Introducing Jill’s New Podcast, We the Sunlight, with Juls Bindi
What does it really mean to speak up—and what happens when telling the truth comes at a cost?In this special episode of Psychologists Off the Clock, Jill Stoddard and Yael introduce Jill’s powerful new podcast, We the Sunlight, a show about the brave act of speaking up in a culture that too often rewards silence. Then, listeners get an exclusive preview of the first episode, featuring Jules Bindi, one of the first women to publicly share that she was sexually assaulted by Harvey Weinstein before the #MeToo movement began.Jules shares her story—from growing up surrounded by trauma and abuse to building a successful career as a massage therapist to Hollywood’s elite. She describes the grooming, manipulation, and sexual assaults she experienced at the hands of one of the most powerful men in the entertainment industry, as well as the complicated question that haunted her afterward: Why did she go back?Together, Jill and Jules explore the complex survival responses that can make victims blame themselves, including fawning, appeasing, and attempting to maintain safety in the face of overwhelming power. Jules also shares what finally helped her come forward, what she feared would happen if she spoke publicly, and why she ultimately decided that staying silent came at too high a cost.You’ll hear about shame, self-forgiveness, post-traumatic growth, and the complicated reality of speaking truth to power. Most importantly, Jules offers a powerful message to anyone considering whether to come forward—and to those who have already spoken up and are living with the consequences.Join us for this moving introduction to We the Sunlight and the story of one woman who discovered that courage doesn’t mean speaking without fear. Sometimes, it means deciding that something matters more than staying silent.Listen and Learn:The story behind Jill’s new podcast, We the Sunlight, and how her own experience speaking publicly about a family member who caused harm inspired her to create a show centered on truth-tellingWhy speaking up can be both deeply meaningful and incredibly costly—and how people weigh the potential consequences before deciding whether to come forwardJules Bindi’s journey from a childhood shaped by abuse and trauma to becoming a successful massage therapist with high-profile celebrity clientsHow Harvey Weinstein used power, praise, promises, and manipulation to groom Jules and exploit the enormous power imbalance between themWhy survivors may continue contact with or return to someone who has harmed them—and how survival responses such as fawning and appeasing can complicate our understanding of traumaWhy asking, “Why did they go back?” can fuel shame and self-blame when survivors are already struggling to understand their own responsesHow fear of retaliation, public scrutiny, victim-blaming, and professional consequences can make speaking out against a powerful person feel nearly impossibleWhat ultimately motivated Jules to come forward publicly and later participate in the legal case against WeinsteinHow becoming a mother helped Jules reconsider what she would want her own daughter to do if she were ever harmedWhy Jules says she experienced fewer negative consequences from speaking up than she expected—and how speaking publicly allowed her to put down some of the weight she had carried in silenceThe difference between taking responsibility for someone else’s harmful actions and finding meaning in the ways we choose to respond afterwardHow Jules has transformed her experiences into advocacy, supporting other survivors and teaching children about bodily autonomy and personal boundariesWhy self-forgiveness can be one of the most difficult—and meaningful—parts of healingWhat to consider if you are wrestling with whether to speak up, including the question of what it may cost you to stay silentJules’ message to those already living through the difficult aftermath of coming forward: celebrate your courage, care for yourself, and remember that the intensity of the moment will not last foreverWhy all of us can support survivors by resisting the urge to judge, question, or shame them for the ways they responded to traumaResources:We the Sunlight podcastJules Bindey / EQ Kid BooksMy Body, My Rules by Jules BindiThe Harmony Hills children’s book seriesAsk Before Touching MeIt’s Okay for Me to Say NoAbout Jules Bindi:</
- 2 weeks ago1h 4m
478. Restoring Childhood with Peter Gray
What if the biggest threat to kids’ mental health isn’t smartphones or social media—but the loss of freedom, play, and independence in childhood?In this episode of Psychologists Off the Clock, Emily welcomes researcher Peter Gray, author of Restoring Childhood: How to Set Kids Free in the Age of Anxiety. Drawing on decades of research in developmental psychology, anthropology, education, and play, Peter challenges some of our most common assumptions about what children need to thrive.Peter explains why play isn’t simply recreation—it’s how children naturally learn independence, problem-solving, negotiation, courage, and the social skills they’ll need throughout their lives. He traces how adults have gradually “colonized” childhood, replacing independent play and exploration with increasingly adult-directed activities, supervision, and schoolwork.Emily and Peter also take on one of today’s biggest parenting debates: the role of smartphones and social media in the youth mental health crisis. Peter offers a provocative interpretation of the historical data, including why teen mental health actually improved during the early years of home computers, video games, and online communication—and why he believes increased school pressure deserves far more attention as a contributor to youth anxiety and depression.You’ll hear why children need opportunities to solve problems without adults swooping in, how risky play helps kids develop courage, why trust can become a self-fulfilling prophecy, and what parents and schools can do to give children more ownership over their lives.Join Emily and Peter for a thought-provoking conversation about what we lose when we try too hard to protect and prepare our kids—and why restoring childhood may require adults to step back so kids can step forward.Listen and Learn:Why play is a biological drive across young mammals—and how it helps children practice the skills they need to become increasingly independentHow self-directed play teaches children to negotiate, compromise, solve problems, consider other people’s needs, and navigate conflict without adults stepping inWhy children’s freedom to play and explore independently has declined dramatically over the past several decades—and what Peter means by the disappearance of a distinct “culture of childhood”How children’s peer cultures once gave kids opportunities to create their own games, norms, language, and social worlds largely outside adult oversightThe surprising mental health trends Peter identifies from 1950 onward, including rising distress during decades when children’s independence was decliningWhy Peter believes the arrival of home computers in the 1990s may actually have improved adolescent well-being by giving teens new opportunities for mastery, independence, play, and connection with peersHow early computers created an unusual reversal in expertise, with teenagers often knowing more than their parents—and why that experience of competence may have matteredWhy video games and other forms of pretend or risky play can give children opportunities to experience fear, vulnerability, challenge, and mastery in relatively safe environmentsPeter’s critique of the popular claim that smartphones and social media are the primary cause of today’s youth mental health crisis, and why he argues the broader research literature does not support such a simple causal storyWhy Peter sees increasing academic pressure and changes in American schooling as an overlooked contributor to rising anxiety, depression, and burnout among young peopleHow schools could become more supportive of mental health by improving school climate, increasing student autonomy, restoring teacher flexibility, protecting recess, and reducing unnecessary academic pressureOne simple question parents can ask children to begin expanding their independence: What would you like to be doing on your own that you aren’t doing now?Why shifting from “What am I afraid to let my child do?” toward “What could I encourage my child to do independently?” can help both children and parents build confidenceWhat Peter calls “TAS parenting”—combining trustful and autonomy-supportive parenting by not only trusting children’s developing capabilities but actively creating opportunities for them to exercise independenceResources:Peter Gray’s book Restoring Childhood: How to Set Kids Free in the Age of AnxietyPeter’s book <a hre
- 3 weeks ago58 min
477. Beyond Belief with Nir Eyal
What if some of the things you believe most strongly aren’t actually facts—but tools you’re using to navigate a complicated world?In this bittersweet final interview for Psychologists Off the Clock, Jill Stoddard welcomes back Nir Eyal, author of Beyond Belief: The Science-Backed Way to Stop Limiting Yourself and Achieve Extraordinary Results. Nir was Jill’s very first guest when she joined the podcast, making this conversation a fitting bookend to her time on POTC. Together, they explore how our beliefs shape motivation, perception, pain, relationships, and our ability to create lasting change.Nir explains why beliefs are different from facts or faith, and why treating beliefs as tools rather than truths can give us more flexibility. He shares his personal story of struggling with his weight, how changing his beliefs helped him persist, and what his experience with Pain Reprocessing Therapy taught him about chronic pain.You’ll hear why “seeing is believing” is only half the story, how our expectations can change our experience of pain and pleasure, why venting may reinforce the very beliefs that keep us stuck, and how expanding your portfolio of perspectives can create more freedom in relationships and everyday life.Join Jill and Nir for a fascinating conversation about the power of belief—and a reminder that feeling bad isn’t necessarily bad. Sometimes, pain comes with purpose.Listen and Learn:Why beliefs are neither facts nor faith, but flexible “working models” that help us navigate reality when the truth isn’t fully knowableHow beliefs influence motivation, behavior, and persistence—and why believing you can succeed may be just as important as knowing what to doNir’s personal weight-loss journey and how searching for the “one true” diet ultimately got in the way of persistenceWhy beliefs can be powerful tools even when we can’t prove that they are objectively true, and how choosing beliefs that serve us can change the way we respond to everyday challengesHow attention shapes perception, why our brains rely on predictions and prior beliefs, and what the classic checkerboard illusion teaches us about seeing realityThe relationship between beliefs, expectations, pain, and suffering—including what Nir learned from Pain Reprocessing Therapy and the surprising power of the brain to change the experience of chronic painWhy feeling bad isn’t necessarily bad, and how redefining discomfort as something that can accompany purpose may help us stop avoiding the experiences that matterHow placebo and nocebo effects demonstrate the powerful role of expectations, and why beliefs can influence our experience through changes in behavior and biologyWhy venting can reinforce negative beliefs about other people, and how “getting it off your chest” may provide short-term relief while making us angrier in the long runHow Inquiry-Based Stress Reduction can help us loosen rigid beliefs by developing a broader “portfolio” of possible perspectives rather than forcing ourselves to replace one belief with anotherNir’s personal transformation in his relationship with his mother, and how questioning assumptions about other people can create more flexibility without requiring them to changeHow expanding our beliefs can create “wiggle room” to respond more flexibly, reconnect with our values, and take responsibility for our own contribution to difficult situationsResources:Nir’s book Beyond Belief: https://bookshop.org/a/30734/9780593852033 Free belief change guide is here: www.nirandfar.com/beyond-belief-liveBonus content and the 30-Day Belief Transformation Journal is here: nirandfar.com/beyond-beliefWebsite: http://nirandfar.comLinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/nireyal/Instagram - http://instagram.com/nireyalPrevious books:Hooked: geni.us/hookedIndistractable: geni.us/IndistractableAbout Nir Eyal:Nir Eyal writes, consults, and teaches about the interse
- Sep 8, 20261h 2m
476. Why We Ask Why with Tania Lombrozo
What makes an explanation feel satisfying, and does that feeling have anything to do with whether it's actually true?Cognitive scientist Tania Lombrozo, author of Why We Ask Why: The Science of Explanation and the Human Drive to Understand, joins Michael to talk about the human drive to explain: where it comes from and what it buys us. She also makes the case that explanations aren't objects sitting out in the world waiting to be found, but mental acts we construct.Tania walks through why philosophers and psychologists have circled the same phenomenon from different angles, and why a strong drive to explain isn't an obvious thing to build into an intelligent system in the first place. Curiosity, she explains, works as a filter on the endless supply of questions we could be asking. She also shares what her own lab has found about what actually predicts it, and why a satisfying explanation tends to open up more questions rather than shut inquiry down.Along the way: Alison Gopnik's provocatively titled paper on the aha moment, and the explore/exploit trade-off behind the randomized summer reading program Tania uses to keep herself exploring. They also get into the self-explanation effect, and why explaining to another person usually beats explaining to yourself. The conversation closes on what to do when a three-year-old asks why, including how to bring a chatbot into that moment without skipping the part where good inquiry gets modeled.Listen and Learn:Why a strong drive to explain isn't an obvious thing to build into an intelligent system, and what seeking explanations actually does for creatures like usWhy explanations are mental acts rather than facts sitting out in the world, and how a punchline makes that idea concreteHow curiosity filters the endless supply of questions we could ask, and why we gravitate toward things just one step beyond what we already understandWhat happens to your curiosity right after a satisfying explanation, and why good answers tend to open up more questions instead of closing them offThe explore/exploit trade-off, and practical ways to build a little more randomness into what you read and what you tryWhy explaining something to another person usually beats explaining it to yourself, and the three things that make the differenceHow to respond when a child asks why, and how to use AI tools with kids without cutting out the modeling of good inquiryResources:Tania’s book: Why We Ask Why https://bookshop.org/a/30734/9780063395008 Twitter / X: https://x.com/tanialombrozo?lang=en Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/tanialombrozo.bsky.social LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tania-lombrozo Tania's Website: www.tanialombrozo.com http://www.tanialombrozo.com/ Michael’s Confidence Course http://herold.coach/courseAbout Tania LombrozoTania Lombrozo is Arthur W. Marks '19 Professor of Psychology at Princeton University. She holds degrees in cognitive science and philosophy from Stanford University and in psychology from Harvard University. Her award-winning research has explored the human drive for explanation in both children and adults. She lives in Princeton, New Jersey, with her husband and two daughters. Her book, Why We Ask Why: The Science of Explanation and the Human Drive to Understand, will be released in October 2026.Related Episodes:428. How to Fall in Love with Questions with Elizabeth Weingarten<a href="https://offtheclockpsych.com/oliver-burk
- Sep 1, 202657 min
475. What to Do When Your Partner is Depressed with David Dozois
Navigating a loved one's mental health struggles can feel like walking a tightrope between wanting to save them and trying to keep your own head above water.In this episode, Dr. David Dozois from the University of Western Ontario highlights his book, What to Do When Your Partner Is Depressed, talking through the toll depression can take on relationships and why the supporting partner's experience so often goes unnoticed.He shares with us why our instinct to "fix" a partner's pain can often backfire, and offers up actionable strategies for giving real support, encouraging treatment, and how to shift from frustration to true connection, without taking on the role of an unpaid therapist.Plus, David touches on essential self-care, navigating tricky boundary dynamics, and safely approaching heavy, sensitive topics couples tend to avoid.Listen and Learn: How clinical depression differs from ordinary sadness, how it impacts both partners in a relationship, and actionable, evidence-based strategies to support a depressed partner without burning out or sacrificing their own well-being The complexities of supporting a depressed partner and reveal why the human impulse to "fix" things often backfires, sharing research-backed strategies on how to move from wrestling with your partner to truly connecting with them first The art of true active listening, explaining why genuine empathy means tuning into your partner’s heart rather than just rehearsing your next response Framing depression as a shared "we" problem rather than an individual label to encourage a struggling partner to seek help without putting them on the defensive How non-depressed partners can support their loved one without burning out or slipping into the role of an unpaid therapist How excessive reassurance seeking can strain a relationship, and why setting compassionate boundaries and practicing response prevention are essential for long-term trustNavigating the delicate balance between self-care and supporting a loved one through depression Resources: David’s Website: https://dozoislab.comDavid’s book: What to Do When Your Partner Is Depressed: Supporting Your Loved One While Caring for Yourselfhttps://uk.bookshop.org/p/books/what-to-do-when-your-partner-is-depressedPre-order Yael’s new book, Why Don’t You Understand Me?: The Surprising Science Behind Connecting in a World of Missed Signals. Then fill out THIS form to get pre-order bonuses!Link to Yael’s newsletter and (for paid subscribers), a chance to win a copy of David’s book!About David DozoisDavid Dozois is a professor of psychology and psychiatry at the University of Western Ontario, where he directs the clinical psychology graduate program and studies cognitive vulnerability to depression, the "why" behind who gets stuck in depressive thinking and why it's so hard to climb out. He's published more than 200 scientific articles and books and has served as president of the Canadian Psychological Association twice.His new book, What to Do When Your Partner Is Depressed: Supporting Your Loved One While Caring for Yourself, tackles something couples therapists see constantly and talk about far too little: depression is never really a solo experience. It moves into the relationship and unpacks its bags. The partner who isn't depressed often becomes the default project manager of the household, the mood, and th
- Aug 25, 202659 min
474. Rethinking ADHD: Beyond Attention with Debbie Reber and Emily King
Parenting a kid with ADHD takes way more than standard advice; it requires understanding a complex brain difference that impacts focus, sleep, big emotions, and daily energy.In this episode, child psychologist Dr. Emily King and TILT Parenting founder Debbie Reber join Emily to give their perspective on what neurodivergent parenting looks like by challenging the "disorder" label, unpacking why behaviors shift between home and school, and diving into hidden struggles like RSD, time blindness, and burnout.From navigating evaluations to handling the gap between your child's age and their developmental stage, this conversation offers the honest, evidence-based grounding every parent needs.Tune in now, and reach out to Emily Edlynn to learn more about her 1-on-1 parent coaching!Listen and Learn: Should ADHD be framed as a medical disorder or a brain regulation difference?How pathologizing language impacts stigma, diagnosis, and access to support in both clinical and educational settings Why the name "ADHD" is misleading and how the disorder goes far beyond inattention and hyperactivity to affect emotional regulation, sleep, appetite, and energy management How to navigate the ADHD diagnosis process from choosing between a pediatrician and a full neuropsychological evaluation to gathering cross-environment data and shifting parent strategies for lasting behavioral change Overlooked ADHD traits that rarely get covered in formal evaluations and practical strategies to support your child without damaging their self-esteem How ADHD-related time blindness, task avoidance, and a lack of future-oriented thinking drive daily struggles like running late and better understanding your child's neurodivergent experience How emotional sensitivity, sensory processing, and energy regulation manifest in children with ADHD and autism and why a child's behavior can look so drastically different between home and school Why raising a neurodivergent child feels like "advanced parenting," and the deep isolation, constant judgment, and overwhelming family burnout that comes with itResources:https://www.dremilyking.com/The Neurodivergent Learner https://www.learnwithdremily.com/bookhttps://www.learnwithdremily.com/bookhttps://www.instagram.com/emilywkingphd/https://www.facebook.com/emilywkingphdhttps://www.linkedin.com/in/emilywkingphd/https://www.debbiereber.com/Differently Wired: A Parent’s Guide to Raising an Atypical Child with Confidence and Hope https://bookshop.org/a/30734/9781523506316https://www.facebook.com/DeborahReberAuthor/https://twitter.com/debbiereber Tilt Parenting Podcast 359 A Conversation with Dr. Emily Edlynn on Raising Autonomous ChildrenEmily Edlynn’s website – contact her directly if you are interested in a parent group! Emily Edlynn’s Substack pieces about ADHD:Raising ADHD: Beyond the DiagnosisRaising ADHD: Why Common Parenting Strategies Don’t WorkWhat the New York Times Got Wrong About ADHD<a href="https://emilyedlynn.substack.com/p/understanding-this-one-emotion-will?r=8n
- Aug 18, 202658 min
473. Are You Type C? with Kore Glied and Anna White
If you’re the kind of person who is pathologically nice, physically incapable of saying "no," and constantly burning out to keep everyone else happy, you might actually have a Type C personality. Debbie Sorensen chats with psychologist Kore Glied and former Wall Street exec Anna White to break down how this conflict-avoidant, super-pleaser trait differs from Types A and B and why hiding your true feelings takes such a heavy toll on your health, career, and relationships.You'll hear Anna open up about her own experience grinding straight through maternity leave until chronic fatigue hit, how these habits usually stem from early criticism or neglect, and how you can change these Type C patterns with a simple SASS framework. Tune in to find out how to Spot your hidden rules, Accept your own worth, Sit with tough emotions, and Say no thoughtfully. Listen and Learn:What defines the Type C personalityAnna shares her personal story of growing up as a Type C personality and a cautionary story of how her "Type C" tendency to put work obligations above her own needs led her to work through a seven-week maternity leave How a personal journey through chronic illness and a chance discovery of the "Type C" personality traits How Type C personality traits develop, how cultural expectations and social rewards reinforce them, and how understanding these origins can help reduce feelings of blame and shame How Type C personalities are driven by guilt and recognizing the subtle patterns that prevent you from asserting your own worth How Type C personality traits can lead to unbalanced relationships, career burnout, and vulnerability to toxic dynamics in both the workplace and at home How Type C personality traits can impact parenting and healthThe practical "SASS" framework to build resilience and break people-pleasing habits Resources:https://thetypecpersonality.com/ Debbie’s burnout appearance on the Type C personality podcast: https://open.spotify.com/episode/6d7AIsfXM18njrNzZvd6Kd To preorder Kore and Anna’s book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/006349244X Kore’s Website https://www.drkorenissenson.com Anna’s care package company, Rest & Heal: https://restandheal.comAbout Kore Glied and Anna White Dr. Kore Glied is a clinical psychologist based in New York City who specializes in helping adults manage anxiety disorders, including obsessive compulsive disorder, and insomnia. Before starting her private practice, she spent many years as an Assistant Professor of Psychology at several major New York City hospitals, including Montefiore Hospital, NYU Medical Center, and most recently, Mount Sinai Hospital. Dr. Glied uses evidence-based approaches such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) to help clients get unstuck and build healthier, more fulfilling lives. Dr. Glied provides training and supervision in (ACT). She has published research on anxiety, trauma, and HIV-related health and has been invited to present her work at national conferences. In addition to her clinical work, Dr. Glied leads corporate wellness workshops focused on managing stress, anxiety, and building healthier relationships. She lives in Manhattan with her husband, two sons, and their dog. As a working mom, she understands the challenges of balancing career, family, and everything in between—and she’s the first to admit she doesn’t have it all figured out.Anna White is a former investments executive who spent 20 years working for a range of Wall Street firms in capital markets, private equity, equity research, and asset management. She experienced severe burnout at one point in her career which led to a chronic illness that was difficult to diagnose, treat, and recover from. Type C traits were a significant contributor to her declining health. After leaving corporate life, she founded a specialty care package company, Rest & Heal, which focuses on supporting women who have suffered hardship and/or illness through carefully curated gift pa
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