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Raising Good Humans: Daily Summaries Delivered
by Dear Media, Aliza Pressman
As a parent, do you ever wish someone could just whisper some realistic and trustworthy support in your ear? And not make you feel awful for not having all the answers? Well, that’s what I’m here for. I'm Dr. Aliza Pressman, developmental psychologist, parent educator, asst. clinical professor, and co-founder of both Mount Sinai Parent游戏副本ing Center and SeedlingsGroup. And I'm a mom... trying to raise two good humans myself, so I'm in this with you! In each episode, we'll go deep (but brief) with both experts and parents to share the most effective approaches and tools and talk about the important bigger picture of raising good humans. My goal is to make your parenting journey less overwhelming and a lot more joyful!
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The most recent episodes — sign up to get AI-powered summaries of each one.
- Today44 min
Why Are All the Young People So Insecure?
What if raising secure kids has less to do with what you do wrong as a parent — and more to do with teaching them to build the right relationships from the start? My guest this week is Dr. Amir Levine, molecular neuroscientist, child psychiatrist, and associate professor of clinical psychiatry at Columbia University. His new book, Secure: The Revolutionary Guide to Creating a Secure Life, offers a unified theory of relationships with surprisingly concrete tools for building security at any age. This episode shares specific, teachable tools for helping kids of all ages — including neurodivergent kids — move through the world with greater security. What you'll learn: Why less than 10% of adult attachment style can be explained by parenting and why that's good news if you've been worrying you've already "done something wrong" What CARP means (Consistent, Available, Responsive, Reliable, Predictable) and why teaching kids to look for CARP friends can shape their relationship patterns for life Why our brains chase drama and ignore the secure people already around us and how to redirect toward a "secure village" How small, everyday micro-interactions create structural changes in the brain and why each one is an opportunity This episode is brought to you buy: BetterHelp: You don’t have to say yes to everything this summer. Find support in therapy. Sign up and get 10% off at BetterHelp.com/humans. Uresta: Learn more about this amazing breakthrough, trusted by over 50 thousand women at Uresta.com Tumble: Machine Washable Rugs, Made Better. For a limited time only, our listeners get 10% off + free shipping at Tumbleliving.com/HUMANS Great Wolf Lodge: Bring your pack together at a Lodge near you. Learn more at GreatWolf.com
- 1 weeks ago45 min
Your Kids Are Wired to Flourish — Here's How to Get Out of Their Way
What if the most powerful thing you could do for your child's brain development has nothing to do with them at all? This episode is for any parent who has worried about screen time, big emotions, or whether they're doing enough — and hasn't realized that the most direct path to a flourishing child runs straight through their own mind. I'm joined by Dr. Richard Davidson, neuroscientist, founder of the Center for Healthy Minds at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, and author of Born to Flourish. What you'll learn: Why neuroplasticity is happening to your brain right now whether you want it to or not The four pillars of flourishing (awareness, connection, insight, and purpose) and the research-backed reason five minutes a day is enough to change your brain. Why flourishing is contagious — and what that means for the hardest kids, the most overwhelmed parents, and everyone in between. Sponsors: Great Wolf Lodge: Bring your pack together at a Lodge near you. Learn more at GreatWolf.com The RealReal: The most trusted name in authenticated luxury resale. Get 25$ off your first purchase when you go to The RealReal.com/humans OneSkin: Unlock your healthiest skin now and as you age. For a limited time, try OneSkin with 15% off using code RGH at oneskin.co/RGH KiwiCo: Build the best summer ever with KiwiCo. Get $10 off on your Summer Adventure Series at kiwico.com/SUMMER, promo code HUMANS.
- 2 weeks ago45 min
Deodorant, Porn, and Nudes: How to Actually Talk to Your Tween About the Hard Stuff
What if the reason the hardest conversations with your middle schooler keep going badly isn't the topic — it's that we keep starting them like a lecture? This episode is for any parent who has braced themselves to "have the talk" about porn, dating, nudes, or consent and watched their kid mentally exit the room before the second sentence. I'm joined by Michele Icard, parenting expert and author of Fourteen Talks by Age Fourteen: The Essential Conversations You Need to Have with Your Kids Before They Start High School. What you'll learn: Why most thorny conversations go wrong before they start, and the BRIEF model that fixes it. Why shame is the wrong tool. What you might be missing about middle school dating, consent, and touch hunger. The throughline of the whole conversation is practice. These aren't talks you nail on the first try, and the goal isn't a single perfect conversation — it's becoming fluent enough at curiosity that you stop needing an agenda at all. Great Wolf Lodge: Bring your pack together at a Lodge near you. Learn more at GreatWolf.com Tumble: Machine Washable Rugs, Made Better. For a limited time only, our listeners get 10% off + free shipping at Tumbleliving.com/HUMANS Merit Beauty: It's time for your makeup and skincare to meet the reality of your daily routine with Merit Beauty.comMyPhone by Ooma: Safe calling with parental controls. Go to ooma.com/myphone to shop phones and learn more.
- 3 weeks ago27 min
Perfectionism Isn't High Standards. It's Hurting Your Kid
What if what we call high standards in our kids, and quietly admire in ourselves, is actually something much more painful underneath? This episode takes on a question that hits closer to home than most parents want to admit: have I been confusing high standards with something more punishing, in my kids and in myself? I'm joined by Professor Thomas Curran, social psychologist at the London School of Economics and author of The Perfection Trap: Embracing the Power of Good Enough, whose research has reframed how a generation of psychologists, parents, and young people understand what perfectionism actually is. We get into why rates are climbing, why perfectionism is so often misread (as drive, as work ethic, as the humble brag we've all been trained to admire), and what it actually looks like to help your kid aim high without paying the hidden price. What you'll learn: Why perfectionism is shame, not standards. The deficit thinking underneath it ("how much less than I appear to others") and why what reads as procrastination, withdrawal, or "not trying" in your kid may actually be perfectionism, protecting them from a shame they can't put words to. (You can't fail at something you didn't try.) The myth that perfectionism produces success. The research, the burnout, the self-handicapping that hold perfectionists back, plus why the culture keeps rewarding it anyway: the job interview humble brag, the curated social feed, schools that prize over-achievement, and a narrowing economy that has parents pushing harder than they want to. What helps at home. Calibrating expectations so your child isn't permanently on tiptoes, decoupling love from accomplishment, modeling making mistakes (and forgiving yourself), the difference between perfectionism and conscientiousness, and how to foster a love of learning that outlasts any one grade. Understanding what perfectionism is helps us stop misreading our kids, soften the pressure we're passing on without meaning to, and protect the part of childhood where trying things and getting them wrong is still part of the joy. Great Wolf Lodge: Bring your pack together at a Lodge near you. Learn more at GreatWolf.com Uresta: Learn more about this amazing breakthrough, trusted by over 50 thousand women at Uresta.com OneSkin: For a limited time, try OneSkin with 15% off using code RGH at oneskin.co/RGH
- 4 weeks ago43 min
Perimenopause Starts Earlier Than You Think — What Every Mom Needs to Know Now
What if the years where you feel less rested, less resilient, less yourself aren't burnout or bad parenting — but a hormonal transition no one prepared you for? This episode tackles a question every woman asks herself: am I losing my edge, or is something actually happening to me? I'm joined by Dr. Mary Claire Haver — the OB-GYN whose work has reshaped how an entire generation of women, doctors, and families talk about midlife, and the first person who made me feel sane in my own body when symptoms started showing up in my early 40s. We talk about why perimenopause is landing earlier than most women expect, why it gets misread as postpartum lag, work stress, or just "getting older," and why so many plugged-in women hear from their doctors that everything looks fine when nothing feels fine. What you'll learn: Why perimenopause is a brain event before it's an ovary event — and the symptoms (brain fog, mood swings, sleep disruption, weight changes, even a frozen shoulder) that can show up years before your periods get irregular, and almost never get connected back to hormones, even by your own doctor The real story of the Women's Health Initiative: what scared a generation of clinicians away from hormone therapy, what the evidence actually says now, and how to think about menopause hormone therapy, vaginal estrogen, and testosterone for women without the fear and without the scams (looking at you, vaginal lasers and pellet pushers) The non-negotiables to start in your 30s and 40s if you can — sleep, protein, lifting heavy, vitamin D, and finding a menopause-certified clinician — plus the five buckets of female sexual function Knowing what's happening inside your own body isn't extra. It's how you stop feeling crazy, find a clinician who actually believes you, and protect the version of yourself who gets to enjoy the decades still ahead. Great Wolf Lodge: Bring your pack together at a Lodge near you. Learn more at GreatWolf.com Merit Beauty: It's time for your makeup and skincare to meet the reality of your daily routine with Merit Beauty.com The RealReal: The most trusted name in authenticated luxury resale. Get 25$ off your first purchase when you go to The RealReal.com/humans
- May 1, 202627 min
The 3 Tools That Actually Work When Your Kid Won't Listen
What if your child's most "defiant" behavior at home isn't a discipline problem — but a sign of how safe you've made them feel? This solo episode tackles one of the most common questions we all have: what to do when your kid digs in, pushes back, and you can feel yourself slipping toward the version of bedtime you swore you'd never have. It comes on the heels of a Today Show segment with Hoda and Jenna that sparked a wave of comments split between recognition and resistance — much of it circling the same anxious question: isn't picking your battles just permissive parenting? This conversation walks through both the why and the how: why home is so often the place where the wildest behavior lands, why permissiveness is not what most of us think it is, and what to actually do in the bathroom at 7:45pm when your kid is still in their clothes and the bedtime window is closing. It also looks at the moments when no strategy is going to work because everyone's nervous system is too lit up, and what to do instead. What you'll learn: Why "defiant" behavior so often shows up the moment your child walks through the door and why that's usually a sign of safety, not a sign that something is wrong The real difference between picking your battles and being permissive, and how to choose your have-tos so you protect what actually matters (sleep, safety, connection) without dragging the whole family through an hour-long fight over a bath The three tools that tend to work in real time — choice, removing the barrier, and natural or logical consequences — plus what to do when both you and your child are too dysregulated for any of them to land, and a note for the parents of the orchid kids who feel like none of this works for them Holding the line while your child storms isn't strictness. It's the steady, loving presence that, over time, teaches them that the world has structure, and that you are the safe place to come home to. Great Wolf Lodge: Bring your pack together at a Lodge near you. Learn more at GreatWolf.com
- Apr 24, 20261h 2m
Are You Oversharing With Your Kids — or Not Sharing Enough?
What if oversharing isn't the real problem — and the quieter habit of holding back is what's keeping us, and our kids, from the connection we're looking for? Dr. Aliza Pressman sits down with Harvard Business School behavioral scientist and author Professor Leslie John to challenge one of the most widespread assumptions in modern parenting and culture: that the path to healthy relationships is learning to say less. It isn't. And understanding why could change how you show up with your partner, your colleagues, and your children. Professor John unpacks the surprising science behind self-disclosure, from the hidden cost of "TLI" (too little information) to how emotional literacy quietly shapes a child's ability to make friends, trust adults, and thrive, and why learning to reveal — adaptively, not recklessly — is one of the most important skills we can grow in our kids. What you'll learn: Why adaptive revealing is a teachable skill The parenting move that quietly teaches kids their feelings are something to hide, and what to do instead Why genuine curiosity, not performance, is the secret to helping your child make and keep friends Great Wolf Lodge: Bring your pack together at a Lodge near you. Learn more at GreatWolf.com Professor Leslie John has published extensively on privacy, self-disclosure, and trust, and is the author of Revealing: How People Build and Reveal Themselves to One Another.
- Apr 17, 202635 min
Is Anxiety Your Secret Weapon?
What if anxiety isn't the enemy but the edge you've been missing? Dr. Aliza Pressman sits down with clinical psychologist, professor, and author Dr. Tracy Dennis-Tiwary to challenge one of the most widespread misconceptions in modern parenting: that anxiety is something to be eliminated. It isn't. And understanding why could change how you show up for yourself and your kids. Dr. Dennis-Tiwary unpacks the surprising science and history behind anxiety, from its ancient roots to how modern psychiatry transformed a normal human emotion into a medical diagnosis, and why that shift has made things harder for all of us. What you'll learn: Why anxiety is actually a superpower (backed by dopamine and oxytocin science) The parenting mistake that makes kids' anxiety worse, and what to do instead Why "fixing" your child's feelings is the one thing you should stop doing today Dr. Tracy Dennis-Tiwary has published over 100 peer-reviewed scientific articles and is the author of Future Tense: Why Anxiety Is Good for You (Even Though It Feels Bad).
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About Raising Good Humans
As a parent, do you ever wish someone could just whisper some realistic and trustworthy support in your ear? And not make you feel awful for not having all the answers? Well, that’s what I’m here for. I'm Dr. Aliza Pressman, developmental psychologist, parent educator, asst. clinical professor, and co-founder of both Mount Sinai Parent游戏副本ing Center and SeedlingsGroup. And I'm a mom... trying to raise two good humans myself, so I'm in this with you! In each episode, we'll go deep (but brief) with both experts and parents to share the most effective approaches and tools and talk about the important bigger picture of raising good humans. My goal is to make your parenting journey less overwhelming and a lot more joyful!
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